Redundancy

Here's what I've been reduced to, every night:

5:45 pm - Arrive home from work, let dog into yard to pee. Drink an entire beer. Change clothes.

6:00 pm - Pour another beer into awesome Nalgene flask the girlfriend bought me and take the dog for a walk.

7:00 pm - Realize there's no more beer on person, walk home.

7:15 pm - Open more beer, feed dog.

7:30 pm to 9:00ish - Continue drinking beer while simultaneoulsy fending off the dog's constant neediness. Maybe play with dog while drinking more beer.

9:00 pm - Realize I had plans to accomplish X, Y, Z simple tasks this evening. Realize I'm too bored and booze-tired to bother. Eat leftovers.

10:00 pm - Play with dog more - she won't allow otherwise. Shower.

10:45 pm - Climb into bed thinking I'm going to read multiple chapters of this novel and finally relax.

10:52 pm - Tumble into another night of fitful, restless sleep.

Ugh.

C Is For Give Me My Damned Samoas!

I had a bizarre dream last night. I was roaming a high school during a lunch period. At a table in the corner of the cafeteria, two people I knew were selling Girl Scout Cookies. One was my old boss, who I will call Hank, and the other was a fellow intern from that job/internship, who I will call Beth.

Hank was standing in front of the table hawking the Girl Scout Cookies like a 1930's carny, and Beth was sitting behind the table taking the cash and handing out the products.

Like anyone with a soul, I love Samoas. They're fabulous. This is important to the story.

So, I walked up and Hank said "Buy some Girl Scout Cookies, man. They're awesome."

Happy to oblige and get my annual Samoas fix, I prepared myself to purchase two wonderful boxes thereof. However, upon inspection of the table, I found no boxes of cookies. Instead, there were only piles of plastic tubes, with a display of sample bowls of each flavor of cookie in front of them.

I asked Beth what was going on with the Girl Scout Cookies, and she explained that the company had decided to reformat this year, to be a bit more "hip" in its selection of snack foods. As such, all the Girl Scout Cookies were now "nibble-sized." In each of the sample bowls was a pile of different Girl Scout Cookies, mashed to crumbs.

I did not want that filth. I wanted Samoas, and I told her so in no uncertain terms.

But then, Beth and Hank started pushing the crumb piles on me like mean teenagers in an after-school special. They were full of "C'mon, everyone's doing it," and "What are you, chicken?" They pressed me so hard that I even considered just buying the junk, until I noticed that there were none in Samoa flavor. Not even Samoa crumbs!!!

I had had enough. I stormed to the other side of the cafeteria, where my brother was sitting at a table. I told him all about Hank and Beth being mean to me, and I described their sub-standard Girl Scout Cookie selection. Like me, my brother is very particular about his food, so I knew he would understand. But in response, he merely slid a bowl of Tagalong crumbs across the table toward me. Seeming to stare straight through me, he said in a detached and emotionless voice, "Just try them, man. They're really good. You don't need any Samoas."

Completely defeated and despondent, I just shook my head and sighed.

Animation Anticipation

I'm excited as hell about the upcoming release of Coraline, which I'm sure you can't miss, since it's being advertised everywhere this week.

But, looking a little further to this coming September, I'm also pumped for Shane Acker and Tim Burton's 9. The first animated action film? I can't think of any other. This looks badassed.

Open To Interpretation - Round 2

I've found a new song with super cool lyrics that I love, and unlike Hold Onto Yourself by Nick Cave, I have no idea what these mean.

The song is called Havoc In Heaven, by Jesca Hoop, the super-talented young lady who I saw open for Elbow at the 6th &I Synagogue in D.C. this March. Her debut album, Kismet, is fantastic, and worth picking up.

So, help me out here - drop some comments and tell me what you think this song is about.

Havoc In Heaven

red ribbon on which we ride
carry us over horizon as the sun setting
night puts on a phantom cloak
sing violet light and evoke
the protection that violet evokes

fasten your focus on your soul
cause is your fruit and flowers on red ribbon
swift justice comes delivery white bone demon

ohhhh ohhhh begun the havoc in heaven
ohhhh ohhhh begun the havoc in heaven

deep deep in the green sea
there is a weapon for me
a pin that is fixing the sea
a pillar of gold shiny and if i can pull it free
the cudgel is coming with me

fasten heave ho pillar of gold
runs through the deepest darkest stone
cudgel undone weighing one ton
bring on your force white bone demon

ohhhh ohhhh begun the havoc in heaven
ohhhh ohhhh begun the havoc in heaven

don't believe your eyes
when the maiden does arrive
you fool she is the enemy
and do not trust the guise of a woman old and wise
for truly she is the white bone demon

dance macaques round the fire
warrior drum, banshee cryer
call to them visions of her pyre
fuelled by the demons throne
we shall subdue her to bone
and ashes to ashes her home

fasten your focus on your soul
cause is your fruit and flowers home
and in one blow
i smite down my foe
and ashes to ashes welcome home

ohhhh ohhhh begun the havoc in heaven
ohhhh ohhhh begun the havoc in heaven...