1. "Dude, I'd have brought him my kid's winning Pinewood Derby car for his kid to use." -- You mean like a ringer? -- "Yeah, then he wouldn't have to spend the time building one with his kid and could come drinking with us."
2. "Strippers like Guy-In-Jeans way better than Guy-In-Suit"
And he hasn't even arrived yet. It's going to be a long night.
Friday, February 29, 2008
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Friday, February 15, 2008
Fucking Assholes
Let me tell you something. I don't give a shit. After today I'm nothing but righteous fury, which is ultimate and immovable.
So, to the wretched fuck who tried to make me feel bad about myself: eat shit, choke on it, throw it up, and eat what you threw up. You're lucky I haven't made things worse for you so far. Moreover, be thankful that in civilized society it's verboten to kick people readily in the privates.
To that person who said what they said: you should go back to manipulating your rectum with your little finger. It's safer and more pleasant than what someone like me (but possessing less restraint) might do if they ever find you.
To the guy on the train who thought my head was an armrest: oh, you fucker, you fucker, you fucker...
To the person helping me with that thing: too damned bad. Do you think I care? Probably not, but let me make it clear, just in case; I don't. Moreover, be thankful that in civilized society it's verboten to readily stab people in the hand with my pen.
To the friend who thought they were looking out for me and wound up judging me, I love you like family, but seriously, suck my stubbly balls. I put up with your shit, so don't even mention mine. Didn't Jesus say something like that once? Yeah, actually he did, but way nicer than that. Look it up.
To that person who won't shut the fuck up: shut the fuck up!
To that one-time-phone-call person whose bullshit I had to endure: you're not going to get far with that attitude. I'll bet you don't talk that way to people in person - because your voice breaks down people's willingness to obey what is verboten in civilized society. I know.
To the person who keeps forcing me into that situation: I don't dare scream "Stop it you self-involved donkey-loving prick!" because I know it would do no good. Nonetheless, if you can find it in your heart to cut it the fuck out, I might find it in mine to keep resisting that urge to pee in your beverage. You may be frightened to know I actually fully fantasized that out the other day.
To anyone reading this and thinking I'm going a little overboard here: yeah, I am, but this is my forum to say what I want, and right now I want to say fuck you to a list of people. So, I win.
So, to the wretched fuck who tried to make me feel bad about myself: eat shit, choke on it, throw it up, and eat what you threw up. You're lucky I haven't made things worse for you so far. Moreover, be thankful that in civilized society it's verboten to kick people readily in the privates.
To that person who said what they said: you should go back to manipulating your rectum with your little finger. It's safer and more pleasant than what someone like me (but possessing less restraint) might do if they ever find you.
To the guy on the train who thought my head was an armrest: oh, you fucker, you fucker, you fucker...
To the person helping me with that thing: too damned bad. Do you think I care? Probably not, but let me make it clear, just in case; I don't. Moreover, be thankful that in civilized society it's verboten to readily stab people in the hand with my pen.
To the friend who thought they were looking out for me and wound up judging me, I love you like family, but seriously, suck my stubbly balls. I put up with your shit, so don't even mention mine. Didn't Jesus say something like that once? Yeah, actually he did, but way nicer than that. Look it up.
To that person who won't shut the fuck up: shut the fuck up!
To that one-time-phone-call person whose bullshit I had to endure: you're not going to get far with that attitude. I'll bet you don't talk that way to people in person - because your voice breaks down people's willingness to obey what is verboten in civilized society. I know.
To the person who keeps forcing me into that situation: I don't dare scream "Stop it you self-involved donkey-loving prick!" because I know it would do no good. Nonetheless, if you can find it in your heart to cut it the fuck out, I might find it in mine to keep resisting that urge to pee in your beverage. You may be frightened to know I actually fully fantasized that out the other day.
To anyone reading this and thinking I'm going a little overboard here: yeah, I am, but this is my forum to say what I want, and right now I want to say fuck you to a list of people. So, I win.
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